Perfectionist Chalkboard Effect

These four-letter words can sound like nails on a chalkboard for a perfectionist. 

• Help – Perfectionist needs help? What? That is an insult. Perfectionists can do it all by themselves without the slightest hint of needing help.
• Fail – Anything not done to perfection, with help, with more time is an automatic fail. 
• Last – Being last at carpool line, last to hand in the test, last to reach a milestone also a fail. Holding yourself back from living life because you are not quite perfect, just yet. 
• Mess – Disorganization is a perfectionist’s worst nightmare. Messes produce headaches and feelings of doom.
• Need – Perfectionists don’t need anything, they can handle everything by themselves!
• Time – Time coveted and time is the enemy- there never seems to be enough time to get the 200 things on To-Do list done. 
• Rest – Similar to time, rest is a luxury and also can be shunned upon because there is too much to be done and done right. 
• Weak – The goal is to show strength and duress. Perfectionists misinterpret feeling deep feelings of sadness as being weak to deal with the problems they face.
• Dirt – Everything must be immaculately clean at all times as if no one even lives here. 
• Rule – Perfectionists live by the rules but wish they could break them. 
• Wish – Connecting to their wishes for their life is difficult when it’s buried deep beneath responsibilities and duties. 

If you agree with any of the above, you might be a perfectionist and you may be suffering from anxiety and/or depression. It can seem like living on a hamster wheel, the faster life goes, the more you put on your plate and less balance you have over life. Sometimes, it can seem like all you want is to be able to count on someone but there is no one there to give you a hand. Sometimes, you wish you could just relax and let others take the reign, but you know that their help won’t meet your standards. You want to show and receive love from your family but you mostly receive pushback because you don’t realize how often you criticize instead of love. If you identify with any of this, there is help and I can help you resolve these issues to lead a life you enjoy and let go of all the should’s.